frying my mind ain't so bad (as far as i kin feel it)--

it's losing my teeth that truly frightens me.

it's listening to my father blindly spouting truisms.
so i may likely smoke prior to seeing him. this will also help me stomach any food stuffs he may suggest we devour.

i mind the people around me when they are not listening. when they are merely awaiting their turn to speak, counting their thoughts and the seconds and gripping tightly to their words with their tongues behind tight lips.

people and their influences. their influences bother me as well. why couldn't they float past the gate of possibilities. why must they insist on following the same tunnel without exploring the windows on their way. without investigating the source of light shining high or to their far left sides upon the aging roads they tread.

i'm unwinding blissfully, arrogantly, ignorantly. i hardly know what goes on around my own perimeter, where do i get the gall, the nerve, the inclination that i know better.

i only want to step upon a stage and bang my drum and sing with a proud tightness around my eyes and a wide mouth excreting the biggest words i can think of with abandon.

i want to live with abandon.

this entry is about me. i guess every entry in this web page is about me, only this time i'm conscious of the fact. yes, i have issues with self-consciousness that creep up time and again; but not always i think. perhaps. ??

"cell phones are killing bees," i tell the people. they don't care. those that do care already know.

i have been spending time watching Tim & Eric's Awesome Show season one cos i've misplaced season two. i've also lent out The Life Aquatic and Dead Alive and now i don't know where they are.

i quit my job at Victoria's Secret. i guess it was hell. i did sort of blow up a bit. totally lost myself for a couple of hours. only now i need a job. i think i will go back to that old movie theater job i had. i can't remember how bad it was anymore.

my. life. me. me. mine.

i've got to pay for some records. i want to invest in a laptop and a drumset. i might work on a list of new year resolutions that includes (and may be limited to): saving all 2010 receipts in a notebook or two; probably two, cos the notebook'll probably fill up fast.

i can think up more things to type, but i've been sitting here for too long.

think about your self....